Dear kitties,

I hereby make a public apology to the highly esteemed Sir Ullrick the Wondercat, for whose leniency and generosity in the matter of the "Wet Cat Incident" I shall forever be grateful. Be sure, there was no malice intended on my part, though I do regret that my actions also lacked any form of foresight whatsoever. Words cannot express how deeply regretful I truly am (although the claw marks on my shoulder are a direct testament to this). I further apologize to any kitties that may have taken indirect offense to my actions, and I hereby swear that the incident shall never again be repeated. I pledge to compensate Sir Ullrick with thousands upon thousands of cuddles and kisses and kitty treats. Furthermore, I publicly acknowledge the superiority of the feline species, and I bow down before it. I am blessed to be allowed continued residence and companionship with such a benevolent and tolerant cat as Sir Ullrick. I am pleased to be allowed to continue in the service of his highly esteemed Self, and shall work night and day to rectify any damage caused by my participation in the "Wet Cat Incident."

Yours sincerely and most humbly,

Femina Curiosa
aka Einstein