Goodbye
This morning, I said goodbye to Ullrick at the vet's office with the knowledge that he might not be coming home. I had a feeling that would be the last time that I would see him, and a phone call around 4 pm confirmed that feeling. He had a lump in his lymph node that was inoperable and untreatable. Rather than bring him home just so I could spend a few more days with him, I made the decision to let him cross the Rainbow Bridge while he was already asleep. To make any other decision would have been unfair to him, and I had already said my goodbyes. It happened so fast, I'm still in shock, but I know that this was the right decision for him. But knowing I made the right decision somehow doesn't make this any easier. It's just such a shame that he was such a young and beautiful cat with a full life ahead of him. He was my first cat that I had as an adult, and he will always hold a special place in my heart.
Vessa and I are hanging in there, but time is the only thing that will lessen the pain right now. It's a visceral emptiness and I keep thinking about his big, green "alien" eyes.
We will miss you.